While I was deployed during 2020, I did as most lower enlisted do and started car shopping (what else do you do while in Afghanistan during COVID?). I wasn’t originally shopping for evos, they were definitely an option but not my first. Being stationed in New York and being from the Midwest, I wanted an all wheel drive, turbo, manual transmission car. That doesn’t leave many options when you aren’t into Subarus or the euro scene (Volvo however was definitely a top contender) I’ve always loved the evo platform, mostly the older CP9 generations, but at the time the evo V (the best evo) wasn’t available to me. There were a plethora of 8s and 9s near but I’ve never been much of a fan, let alone wish to daily one for the foreseeable future in upstate NY. So naturally the X was a decent option. Is it the best looking evo? No. Does it have the legendary 4g63? Also no. However, it fit all of my criteria, wasn’t a bore, gets decent enough gas mileage, and was comfortable. Naturally after finding the route I’d like to take, there were none in the immediate area in upstate. But mama didn’t raise a quitter, after looking in Jersey, Chicago, and just about every major city from Cody Wyoming to Jacksonville Florida, I finally found one in budget with lower miles in Texas. Only issue was a branded title. I’m not one for looks, it didn’t have to be in pristine condition, it was going to be a fun daily! So upon our return from the sandbox, I organized the funds, and a friend from home to fly down, grab the car, and drive it back to west river SD for me. The plan was to have the car sitting at home ready for me to pick it up while on leave.
Between Covid restrictions in NY, and typical Army shenanigans, my leave dates were postponed for a few days, which on the bright side helped because the friend hadn’t been able to get a flight down yet. By the time I had gotten my own flight home, unpacked and decompressed, he had just gotten to Texas (about a week after what we had planned) and began the trek back. Due to some “spirited” driving, he had managed to fry the clutch just south of the Nebraska Kansas border, leaving me to lead a rescue mission. Borrowed my fathers pickup he had left in SD when they had moved to Florida, and headed down, calling every U-Haul in their vicinity. Apparently everybody and their mother needed a trailer from U-Haul during Covid, and after much deliberation with the guy about how a car dolly would not work, I secured a trailer just south of where the car had broke down. This isn’t even the worst of this entire endeavor. Three broken come-alongs later, we were headed back home hopefully in time to slap a new clutch into the car and drive back to NY. But my luck had apparently run dry, about 150 miles away from home, the ol 3rd gen gas dodge had enough and spat the rod through the block. This pickup was well maintained, never abused, and showed no signs of the impending catastrophic failure until the smallest of inclines in east river laid the 5.7 to rest. A few road side “sodas” later, another friend who just happened to be in the area with an empty trailer helped up get both the evo and the dodge home. The evo ended up in his front yard ready to be torn into, and the dodge went to a farm upstate (almost literally). Mind you, this is December in the black hills of South Dakota, temperature regularly in the negatives, and no shop space in anyone’s garage. Between a tarp, nepco heater, and enough caffeine, nicotine, and spite, the evo had a new clutch and ready to hit the road (minus the hand sanded flywheel but let’s not focus on that). Leaving home for upstate NY with no time to spare, barley any stops, and some average speeds comparable to a redneck cannonball run, I made it back with 15 minutes to midnight, just enough time to bullshit with the gate guard and sign back in. From there life with the evo was uneventful in retrospect, served its purpose as a fun daily car! Of course as we all do you crave more but that would have to wait.
After finishing my contract, doing some mild changes to the car along the way, I was ready to brave the open road yet again. This time Florida was the target, visit my parents before heading back to the Midwest. Taking coast roads, hitting the first Waffle House that came into view, the drive was fantastic. I do honestly believe the X is one of the best enthusiast cars for a trip like that, not the comfiest ride but damn fun. I had made it to Florida enjoyed some R&R for once and had to head back north. Now the car had been acting strange with the serpentine belt, and I knew the water pump was the culprit. In roadkill fashion I had a spare with me, however also in roadkill fashion I neglected to bring a spare belt. Just into the south side of St. Louis, the car threw the belt and pulley from the water pump. Shut the car off, coasted down the first off ramp, blew through the light, and straight into the parking lot of a Hardee’s and popped a front wheel onto the parking block. No biggie, I’d been a mechanic for years at that point. Drop the side of the motor, swap the pump, slap the belt on, fill it with coolant, and be on my way. Except I didn’t have a belt, and nobody would deliver to the parking lot of a Hardee’s on the south side of St. Louis. Thankfully, as though an angel of luck had graced my presence in the form of a lovely woman working at the Hardee’s, had noticed my predicament and offered to pick one up for me! After refusing to take any cash, any form of repayment for her kindness, I was on the road again. Well, after a very sketchy hotel and an ungodly amount of chick-fil-a.
From there the car was amazing, did everything I asked of it, slowly modified over the years it was a full bolt on, flex fuel canyon car. Still being a daily and being abused in the hills on the weekends, she was showing some wear. The “fresh” repaint was cracking, showing the shoddy prep work underneath, but the (in my opinion, great) 4b11t was running strong. Until a very ordinary day, during a very ordinary drive, a loud bang proved otherwise. Sure I’d been hard on the car, but it’s an evo, who doesn’t beat on it when they can? But I’d never neglected maintenance. Well the rod in cylinder 4 thought otherwise. After grabbing a used long block in Denver, and quite a lot of “while we’re in there”, she was on the road again, now with a built head, bigger turbo, and all the fixings to make a formidable canyon car without breaking the bank. Now I’ve made many misjudgments in all my 28 years, we all have, but this is where I learned that reviews on tuners should be looked through with a fine tooth comb. Whether it be disdain for email tuners, or fear of destroying another block, I just ran the car with a very “meh” tune, conservatively for quite a while. Between other life events, and typical mechanical burnout, the car was built but never had the same gusto it should with the parts in it. It wasn’t until just recently a good friend put me in contact with an actual Evo tuner, Rickerman, and I got the car tuned to perfection. Just in time for me to bid farewell as a new adventure makes its way over from New Zealand. I’m sure I will make another post once that car arrives!
I do apologize for my meandering typical Midwestern story, there is so much more in between, but the story this car has, and the adventures it has taken me on has not only been mechanically frustrating, but taught me more about myself. This car, the ugly duckling of the evos, has been the most beautiful car I could’ve ever asked for, not for its looks, its power, but its sheer unforgiving nature.
If you’re the kind of person who loves to tinker, aren’t afraid of a few late nights in the shop, and get that little chill down your spine when the boost hits just right around a bend, I cannot recommend the X enough.
Thank you for reading this absolutely insane series of events that one dumb E4s decisions led to. -Jacob
